The Saffron Racket (and other observations)
I had to buy some saffron the other day. First time I ever bought saffron. I think maybe I'll quit my job and grow saffron full time. If you're asking yourself why, then you've never bought saffron.
Because this much saffron costs FOURTEEN BUCKS, that's why. If the jar was packed full, like the other spice jars, I probably wouldn't have blinked. But it's only 1/3 full.
It isn't packaged like this. They put it in a little white baggie, fold it up illicit-style, and stick it in the jar. Keeping it extra extra fresh? I doubt it. It wasn't sealed, so it would be no different than having it out in the jar. They do it because selling a fully packed jar of saffron would cost about eighty dollars, and who's gonna buy that? And they're not about to create a special spice jar just for the saffron. Then they couldn't run it through all their labeling and capping machines. So yea, I get it, but that's not the point. The point is, what the hell is so damn precious about saffron that it can fetch fifty cents per thread the size of an eyelash?
Just after writing this, I decided I'd try to answer my own question. Conveniently enough, there's a saffron.com, and it has a FAQ that addresses this:
Saffron it is not expensive because you use very little. When you buy an ounce for $35.95, divided into 670 portions, your cost per portion is 5 cents. Note that only our saffron will yield that many portions because it has 230/255 degrees of coloring strength.
I wish I had known that saffron is as powerful as it is. It looks so harmless. Practically odorless, too. You look at it and you'd think you need to toss in the whole lot. I'm just now beginning to learn the finer points of cooking. I don't know much about spices. I knew nothing about saffron other than a recipe called for it. That bit about "coloring strength" is absolutely true. The other day I decided to "wing it", and learn some culinary lessons by trial and error. I was making Pork Cutlets A la Guess; I threw in some wine, butter, garlic, salt, pepper, onion...and what the hell, let's try some of this new saffron shit.
I pulled out a pinch, ground it up in my fingers, and dropped it in the gurgling sauce. The red thread thingies instantly dissolved and turned the entire batch bright yellow. I wasn't expecting that. Red threads. Intense yellowing.
The cutlets tasted okay but you couldn't look at them. They turned a bilious yellow. A dinner of spleens. Nik had a few bites and passed on the rest.
D minus. Hey, I'm learning.
Sack Him
DenverBroncos.com has employed a ...writer... to poorly execute a bad idea. If it was a well executed bad idea, it might pass muster. What's this sort of dreck doing on an NFL team's Website in the first place? If I was forced at gunpoint to use onomatopoeia to describe this embarrassing piece, I'd say thud.
Broken Record Time
Ted Turner is a strange, strange man. But he's dead on here. The CNN founder thinks CNN has gone downhill fast, and I certainly won't argue that. What frustrates me about CNN and network news more than anything is their curious refusal to investigate and report the many fascinating stories all around us all the time. Instead we get Flavor of the Week stories that are beaten like a dead horse while real news is happening in every corner of the world. This is also why I like Wired magazine. They get it. They cover what's cool. They report what's amazing. They are closer to being my personal town crier than any other news source, and they're not really a news source.
Labels: at home
7 Comments:
They could run the special saffron jar through the filling and capping machines. That ain't it. Dollars to doughnuts says they ain't got no special filling and capping machines in the first place.
If I had special powers, I would venture a guess that the McCormack Corporation buys the jar and cap already labeled, then send the jar, cap and the saffron (that they also already get pre-packaged from grower-x out in Saffron-land or whatnot) and send the whole do-hickey to some co-packer out in Jerkwater Iowa to get hand-assembled by migrants.
The copacker is charging something like 17 cents for every one of those bad boys, but the McCormack Corporation doesn't care, cuz they neither have the space themselves for the packaging line, and they also have a $14 pricepoint. Damn.
10:22 PM
And I can't put together a proper sentence for shit.
10:24 PM
Saffron is best used to flavor/color basmiti rice and other Indian dishes.
Buy Madhur Jaffrey's "Invitation to Indian Cooking."
This is the cook book all Indian women learn to cook with when they move to the U.S. from India.
In India, any woman who has some money hires a full time cook.
Here, they need to learn...
-Jeff
11:09 PM
that's basmati not basmiti
11:10 PM
"Proof" that CNN knows that they've lost their way is the fact that they chose to quote Christiane Amanpour, whom I actually respect as a no-nonsense on the scene reporter, saying "..everyone else is doing that. Why do you think it's important not to?"
CNN used their one and only "real" reporter to claim that constant shark attack updates and runaway bride press conferences are indeed the most valuable use of air-time. Very surprising coming from her and shame on her for endorsing a follow-the-pact mentality.
Regarding saffron, I went to www.safron.com and you just have to love a product whose selling point is:
ALL RED! NO YELLOW WASTE!
LOL....
Reason #4,723 to hate the D&C:
Here was the weekend in sports:
Thrilling French Open final, game 6 of NBA Eastern Conf. Finals, Memorial Golf Tourament (in which a LOCAL was contending), continued Yankee suckage (which I like), all local teams in action...
And the lead sports story....Bills alternate uniforms.
Ugh.
Dave
9:34 AM
For the record, Dave and I were in Buffalo yesterday and checked out the sports section in the Buffalo News. There was no mention of Bills uniforms in that section or in the entire paper for that matter! Why is that BIG news in Rochester??? Anyway - The Buffalo News covered all of the topics Dave was concerned about in the front page of sports. We need a real paper in this town! Gannett papers suck!!
~Denise
12:37 PM
The willow side of lilly and willow. I loved the Saffron story. I wanted to buy some of the crocus's that saffron comes from (crocus sativus) but the bulbs were so expensive, and my thought was what if they don't grow. them I am out like 15 dollars for little bulbs, that weren't that pretty of flowers
All mainstream news has gotten so sensationalized and morbid and embellished, like true stories everywhere aren't good enough. I listen to the BBC online, it is interesting and funny to hear a foreign British take on America.
10:35 PM
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