Well well well. Another year has hardened into history. Another Is is now Was. Another Now is now Then. Etcetera. But y'know...I still insist that this time thing must be speeding up. Perception-wise, at least. Major time-space continuum warpage at most.

So yea. Last year's predictions. How'd I fare? Well...

(...Sound of a long scroll unfurling, with a muted drum roll in the background...)

Care to make a few of your own for 2006? We'll call it a shootin' match.

Today I saw an ad on teevee for the New York Times. The paper, not the Web site. You know, the one where the camera switches between half a dozen false interviews with "subscribers" (wannabe actors), who contend such hilarities as "it keeps me inspired", and "There's the New York Times, and then there's everything else". (Yes, I'll take everything else.)

You know that the old media is dead when the mighty New York Times is forced to advertise and offer half off subscriptions. The paper is dying. It's not yet dead, but it's on life support. It has tubes up its nose and it's not responding. Pupils are fixed and dilated. Unless digital paper is almost ready for the world, which it apparently isn't, newspapers are doornail dead. The times, they are a changin'.

You know the holiday season is upon us when you see electric razor commercials at every turn.

I've long felt that Morgan Freeman is one of the best actors out there. There's something about the guy that commands respect. Now I think he might be one of the most important actors out there. He's very wise. It's empty shells like Al Sharpton and yes, Jesse Jackson, who need the country to talk about racism on their terms because progress, which we most certainly have made, is not in their best interest.

On the flip side, we have idiots like Philadelphia NAACP President J. Whyatt Mondesire, who stands by his idiotic newspaper editorial about Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb.

Now he comes out and claims that he wrote the article as a fan, not as the President of the Philly chapter of the NAACP writing an article on race. No, Whyatt, you don't get to take that hat off only when it suits you. You are what you are.

I'm not sure how someone this unwise could be the President of anything. But it sounds like he won't have that title for long.

I'm looking forward to seeing King Kong. I knew nothing about the original story, and have never seen the classic 1933 film. But it's a Peter Jackson film, so it's a must-see. And when I heard that it's a tragedy, well, it's a double must-see. Compelling tragedies tend to make me secretly weepy. I'll "rub my eyes", stretch my arms and "scratch my cheek", that sort of thing. Actually, even bad films have done me in. I now know the general plot of King Kong, and I figure that even a giant lovesick ape will give me salty cheeks. What a sap.

TLC is a great network and all, but I had to laugh when, between a program and its commercials, a TLC scheduling promo announced the following, in a soft voice usually reserved for feminine product commercials: "Stay tuned for Electric Orgasm, followed by Woman with Half a Body."

This guy might be one of the most dangerous creatures on the planet, but if he keeps talking like this, he'll make himself irrelevant. You have to think such talk will make him irrelevant....okay, you hope such talk will make him irrelevant...and you hope you're not overestimating people.

The most expensive typo, ever. Imagine how fired that guy is...

Still more research touting the health benefits of coffee. Put a pot on, will ya?

Lest We Forget...

"It is never too late to be what you might have been."

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